Today, I sat down with two copies of a six page, double-sided document entitled “Junior Kindergarten Registration”. I carefully placed each set beside one another in front of me on the desk. I wrote down my children’s names and then proceeded to write the same birth date, the same contact information, the same emergency contacts, the same developmental milestones, the same health status and the same likes and dislikes. The lump that was forming in my throat was becoming almost unbearable. I am a full eight months from the moment where my two “babies” will head off to school however this is the beginning of the “end” of this phase. I am struck that on their registration form that they seem so alike. I feel like I need to add a disclaimer for the teacher outlining their differences and individual character traits!
We have reached the point of parenthood where you have to send your child off into the world and hope against all hopes that they are prepared for life without you. I have no doubt that they will love every moment of their new school lives filled with learning, friends and new experiences. No, I am not worried about them at all. I am more worried about myself! I cannot imagine the day where I am a busy mom of three with two children home AND BOOM they are all at school. It will be ripping off the parental band-aid with one fast and satisfying rip.
What will I do? Dance. Cry. All at the same time?
In this moment, the hours of self-doubt and worry about resigning from my job seem entirely worth the sacrifice. I will never have had the chance to spend every day with these two energetic, happy, active, smart and at times frustrating little people!
“The most important thing that parents can teach their children is how to get along without them.”
― Frank Clark
This day at times seemed like it would never come and if it did, I felt that I would be too burnt out to notice. The fog of the last few years has been lifting at a rapid pace. I am seeing more clearly. I am starting to feel like myself again. The day that those two little ones strut into Junior Kindergarten with their big backpacks side-by-side will be a big one. I will know that they are ready to take those next few steps without me. And that, is a job well done! The most comforting part is that they will be together as they have always been. They will be experiencing this new chapter filled with its ups and downs side-by-side.