There are rare moments in my house when I am blessed to experience one on one time with one of my three children. Tonight I was lucky enough to experience a full half an hour with my youngest son, Max. My Max is the sweetest, little boy. We were able to read books together and cuddle quietly. It was one of those moments as a mother where you can feel who your son/daughter is going to be.
As a mother of multiples I have had to change my techniques from my first experience as a mother. As a first time mother I would stare and hold my son for HOURS upon HOURS. It was such a special time looking back.
As a mother of twins I had to change my techniques in terms of …
Sleep – I have RARELY rocked my twins to sleep. I prefer to walk into their room and *plunk* them into their cribs (still awake), kiss them, say “good night” and “I love you” and DONE!
Eating – At mealtime I call them for their lunch. They come running to their respective chairs. They have learnt that they need to quickly get to their seats! They don’t want their brother or sister stealing their lunch!
Caring/Empathy – When one child is crying or hurt I have witnessed my sixteen month olds rubbing the other’s back or head in an effort to comfort.
Sharing – My twins will quite often exchange food from their tray. Peas will be taken by Emma. Carrots will be taken by Max. It works!
Fun and Play – A simple curtain panel becomes an amazing toy when another baby is hiding behind it! Peek a boo!
I am often told by other moms that I have the harder job and I don’t think I always do. Yes there are times when having twins is enough to make you want to start running…with no destination…just start running. Yes there are times when you are so overwhelmed that you are almost sick to your stomach.
But there are also moments where my babies are playmates, entertainment for one another, comforting to one another and they have learned how to be more patient (at times) and less needy (at times). Or is it that I just don’t have the time/energy/enough arms to accommodate so my tolerance is higher? I do notice my mom will often say “oh poor Baby A” or “oh poor Baby B” if they are forced to wait or I don’t go running to them. But I think we have all learnt how to deal with our situation. I have had to lower my expectations. They have had to learn to wait. They may cry while waiting. But I think that is the nature of the beast.
As I told (in an especially frantic moment…most likely including three snow suits) Isaac last week “Mama only has two arms”.
I: But why? You should have three. Three kids. Three arms.
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